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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Texts From Last Night

Also found in my wanderings today: Texts From Last Night. These are the text messages you wish you hadn't sent last night. Or sent and then realized you needed to share them with someone else.

I can't stop looking away from this site. It's like watching a horrible train wreck. Some of my favorites so far:

(407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passed out. when you wish upon a star...

(214): Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

(519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"   (PB note: I snorted my drink through my nose after reading this one).

(510): he said he didn't have a condom.
(415): and you said?
(510): that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.

(901): guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching

(312): I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.

(919): so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

Enjoy, folks. 

-- PB


Topaz said...


I'm trying so hard not to laugh! That Simba one is killing me! So is the pinecone! Gosh, thank you for turning me on to this site!

The Panserbjørne said...

Topaz: You're welcome! Ditto on the Simba one, which is still my favorite. Good lord, what that girl must have thought....

-- PB

Ms Scarlett said...

One of my favorites sites!! Nearly as good as for sheer train-wreck quality...

Petal said...

I love the ready to be a mom one....will have to file that one away for *that* opportune moment! too funny

CW said...

I love this site and just sent it to 3 of my friends. My favorite?

(803): When i woke up this morning she asked me "when did you first find out that you could see the future." I gotta stop drinking.

LMAO, and a wee bit of Deja Vu.

Thanks PB!

Anonymous said...

Texts From Last Night is one of my FAVORITE sites.

Another hysterical one is However, you have to commit a little more time to the comedy process because, well, texts only have 160 characters to be funny. Emails can go on for weeks.

Anonymous said...

Too damn funny. Train wreck - good analogy! That Simba one...oh my!

The Panserbjørne said...

Scarlett: I used to have a friend who worked at Wally World for many years (he's escaped now, thankfully). Will have to check that site out too!

Petal: Yeah, I imagine that kind of comment would magically cause a "lost" condom to materialize from nowhere, all right.

CW: Oh, good, I'm glad you liked it so well.

Dharma: How had I never heard about this site before now? I mean, I follow a LOT of weird sites.

Southerngirl: The Simba one STILL makes me go *sporfle* when I think about it.

-- PB

Vixen said...

My favorite is def the 'I'm ready to be a mom' one. HAHAHAHA~! Bet he wasn't expecting that one ;)

Jade said...

OMG, thanks for turning me on to that site! A perfect way to start each day...


The Panserbjørne said...

Vixen: I'll bet the guy damn near had a heart attack after that, actually. Sounds like a fantastic response.

Jade: You're quite welcome! Drop in anytime. :)

-- PB